'Hell's Kitchen': Mama mia! Chef Ramsay said what!?
This is leadership? Sure, Benjamin went over to women's team and immediately it was vastly improved. (If I didn't know better, I'd say those women just needed a man to tell them what to do.) But there is a difference between leadership and bossing people around, being rude, telling them that they are worthless and announcing, loudly, that you'd rather kill yourself than deal with your teammates. And that's exactly what Benjamin was doing.

Is this what chef Gordon Ramsay wants in his kitchen? Oh, wait ... maybe he does.

This night was largely about winnowing the herd and enjoying Ramsay's own way of dressing people down. The challenge was a special one: celebrating a couple's 50th wedding anniversary by updating the recipes served at their wedding, including trout almandine, steak Diane and chicken Kiev. Salvatore came up with chicken ... meatballs. Raw chicken meatballs.

So let's recap, shall we? Salvatore the Italian cannot cook pasta or meatballs. Mama mia! No surprise, he was the first to go tonight. Ramsay dispatched him with a "Your time has run out."

Ciao, baby!

Later, there was a special field trip to Philippe's in downtown Los Angeles and a terrific new challenge: Come up with your own gourmet sandwich a la the world-famous French dip. Because the red team has one more player, they had to pick someone to sit out the challenge. Benjamin chose, of course, Siobhan, because he was gunning for her. And you knew it was coming: Ramsay tried her sandwich and told the red team that if they had included hers instead of Fran's, they'd be the winning team. (Best line of the night, when Ramsay told Fran that she'd been up for elimination so many times that her footprints had left an indentation in the carpet.)

Instead, victory went to the blue team, which took a private jet to the wine country and promptly got pickled, with Ed taking off his clothes in the hottub and practically screaming: "Look! Look at my penis! Please look!" Isn't this guy a high school cooking teacher in his "real" life? Better lock up that cooking Sherry, folks.

But it turns out the sandwich challenge was Siobhan's high point. She botched her scallops at the dinner service, earning her a "You donkey!" from Ramsay, who then forced her to eat her mistake. And later he forced her to take off her jacket and leave Hell's Kitchen.

But here's my real question: The guy who confronted Ramsay about the undercooked steak. Was he for real? A plant? For a tough guy, he could barely form a sentence. But what was Ramsay saying in response? Between the quick patter, the bleeped-out bad words ... and the strangeness of it all, I could barely make it out. There was something from Ramsay about "go get a shave" and "you look like a quail." Huh? You look like a quail?! And then, I swear I heard something about a bunny. Did anyone else get any more than that? Let me know.

And note to Fox: Can't you subtitle these Ramsay rants? Pretty please?


Another two-hour 'Hell's Kitchen'

The last time we saw Hell’s Kitchen, the show featuring the cursing Brit, Scott and Autumn received a stay of elimination and switched teams.

Autumn called her teammates a bunch of female dogs.  (Well not exactly. But you get the point.)

The next day the chefs came outside to see Gordon Ramsay sharpening his knives in front of a muddy pen filled with pigs. (Somebody call PETA!)

Fear not. The contestants only had to catch the little pigs, which were each wearing a different ingredient name around their necks. Each ingredient was to be used for a cooking challenge.


After a fast cleanup, the teams split into pairs.

Scott quickly established himself as a bossy know-it-all. (Surprise, surprise.)

Nilka and Fran’s first dish of prunes and blood sausage was not appreciated by Ramsay, who spit out the food.   (In all fairness, it was Scott who decided to pair the two ingredients.)

Jason messed up when he didn’t listen to Autumn, who suggested that he make a honey mustard sauce. (He vetoed her decision. Ramsay later said that honey mustard actually would have been a better choice.) Maria messed up by serving up a sweet potato soup instead of showcasing pork as the main ingredient.

The blue team won the challenge. As a result, the blue team went to a spa. The red team was punished by having to round up the pigs and wash them off.

Later that evening, Salvatore emerged as an “Italian Dr. Phil,” according to Fran. (He has an uncanny ability to make his fellow competitors comfortable around him. He got Siobhan to admit to participating in fetish balls and other activities while working. Holli, who claimed to have the largest porn collection ever, also admitted to filming adult movies with ex-lovers.

The next day, Ramsay told the contestants that for the first time, Hell’s Kitchen would be serving barbeque.

Nilka started frying chicken hours before the dinner service, which made Ramsay start cursing. I believe that was his first meltdown of the episode. (Twenty-three minutes into the episode might be a record.)

Just before the service, Ramsay said that because of the extreme demand, he double-booked the evening. That meant that each team would cook in the kitchen for two hours.

Maria undercooked the crab hush puppies. Ramsay yelled. Salvatore revealed that he never went to school, which accounted for him not being able to write properly. (Ramsay probably felt like a jerk for yelling at him about his handwriting.) Nilka and Fran started yelling at each other for not communicating. (Pretty ironic.) Fran rebounded by having a fantastic service on the appetizer.

Autumn encouraged her customers to send back their food as a form of sabotaging the blue team.

Scott overcooked the fried chicken, which caused Ramsay to curse him out. Ramsay diverted his attention to Siobhan who attempted to serve a raw burger. Ramsay smashed it with his hand.

Ramsay praised Jay for cooking apetitizers. Salvatore struggled in the kitchen when he wouldn’t communicate with the rest of his teammates.

Ramsay screamed at Holli and Maria for putting in two orders for the same table. A few seconds later, Maria messed up another order. Ramsay turned his fangs onto Jason who fried chicken in the same grease as the French fries.

In the end, the red team lost the dinner service. “It’s almost as if you guys hate each other,” he told them.

Because of her fantastic dinner service, Ramsay chose Fran to select the two team members to nominate for eviction. Scott totally threw Maria under the bus saying that she wasn’t as into the competition as he was from the beginning of the service.

Scott later approached Fran in private and lobbied to get Maria eliminated from the competition.

Later, Fran nominated Maria and Nilka for elimination. (WOW!) Nilka said that she was surprised by Fran’s last minute decision. Even Ramsay looked shocked.

Once again, Fran used that lame “poor teamwork” excuse for Nilka. Hmmm. What’s going on there? That same excuse had been used for Autumn in the past. It’s highly suspicious given that neither woman was the weakest cook of the service. Maybe these contestants are slightly threatened.

Ramsay called up Scott, and told Nilka to go back into line because she was safe. Ramsay challenged Maria’s passion and pride. Scott said he worked extremely hard. He said he possed leadership technique.

Ramsay kicked out Maria.

Maria said she didn’t show her heart. She said that Scott didn’t have as good a service as she did.

Nilka started the beginning of the second episode on a tirade. She cursed out her entire team. She told them to kiss her buttocks. (Use your imagination.)

“It was the wrong decision,” Fran said of nominating Nilka. Fran vowed to put herself up instead of Nilka in the future.

The next day was about using the five mother sauces — tomato, hollandaise, bechamel, veloute, and demi-glace. Ramsay wanted to test the chefs' creativity with the mother sauces. Ramsay mother and wife came to judge the offerings.

Despite losing to Nilka in the head-to-head challenge, Ramsay singled out Jason’s dish as the most note-worthy dish of the day. As a result, the blue team won. The red team had to clean both kitchens as punishment. The blue team ate at a British pub.

Autumn beat her new teammates in a dart challenge. Each member of the blue team was then given cookware as a reward.

Meanwhile, Siobhan was having an allergic reaction to the cleaning products being used in the kitchen.

Later during the dinner competition, Siobhan didn’t know that pasta had to cook in boiling water which ticked off Ramsay. Salvatore committed a mortal kitchen sin by lying to Ramsay about how he cooked a dish. (He attempted to add uncooked Risotto to a near-finished dish to stretch out the amount of portions.) Ramsay said he could not trust Salvatore after catching him in the lie. (Uh oh.) Ramsay told Benjamin to watch Salvatore.

Nilka forgot to add lobster to the Risotto, which resulted in him yelling at her. Fran overcooked scallops, which resulted in Ramsay throwing up his hands and heading over to the blue kitchen. Ramsay then started fussing at Jason about not keeping pace cooking chicken. Ramsay focused his attention on Scott, who undercooked the beef Wellington. He pulled him into the back room, and yelled at him some more.

Ramsay was spreading the love all over the red team. After 90 minutes of mishap after mishap, Ramsay kicked out their entire team.

Ramsay and his sous chef’s finished cooking the remainder of the red kitchen’s food. Ramsay called the red team back to clean the kitchen. He said it was the most disorganized service in the history of Hell’s Kitchen. (That is saying a lot!)

During the team deliberation, Scott basically said that his teammates were horrendous, and had no cooking experience. All the insults didn’t go over too well with the red team. Fran announced that she and Scott were the bottom two teammates.

Ramsay asked Fran why she was nominated. She responded that she didn’t know. She added that Siobhan should have been nominated. When Ramsay asked Nilka to make sense of the confusion and asked her the best chef on the team, Scott jumped in with his typical arrogance.

“I’m the only one who works in fine dinning restaurants,” Scott said.

“You could have surprised us by the way you produce,” Fran quickly interjected.

Ramsay made a comment about the bad teamwork. He then called up Scott, Siobhan, and Fran for nomination.

Scott said that he’s a hard worker. He said he was the best cook and leader on the team.

“This team will die if I’m not here,” Scott said.

“I can’t take it anymore.,” Ramsay said in reference to Scott’s constant self-promotion. “I kept waiting, and waiting, and waiting.”

During his confessional, Scott said he was going to continue and be the best chef. (Whatever!)

Ramsay then sent Benjamin to the red team. Ramsay said the team was in need of leadership.


'Hell's Kitchen': Ramsay steps in and mixes things up
The episode began with Jason flying off the hinge after he felt that his teammates “threw him under the bus.” He was in full temper-tantrum mode.

What a coincidence that this week’s episode was all about teamwork. As a result, Gordon Ramsay opened up the kitchen for lunch to build teamwork among the contestants. The customers were 100 members of the USC marching band.

Jason was struggling during the service. He wasn’t communicating with teammates or Ramsay, which resulted in Ramsay jumping down his throat. Jamie was struggling on burgers, and Scott (“Mr. Perfect”) served a raw burger.
The women’s team won and prepared to enjoy their day at the beach with Ramsay.

Fran said she was putting on a “MILF” outfit. (I almost spit out my food.)

The women headed to Malibu in vintage cars. Meanwhile the men were cleaning up garbage from a gigantic ditch, which didn’t look fun at all.

Ramsay greeted the women on the beach. Ramsay, who is a former professional soccer player, challenged the women to a game of soccer, them against him and his family. (Are you getting tired of the team theme? I surely was.)

Going into the dinner service, the teams felt very united. I was wondering how long that would last.

Fran commented that she needed to have a good service. During the prep portion of the service she burned her hand with boiling water. (Not a good start.)

Holli and Salvatore worked as assistant maitre d.

Ramsay complained about Salvatore’s handwriting on his tickets. (Salvatore all but admitted that he didn’t know how to write English.) Holli, who said that she worked at IHOP as a teen, breezed through the orders.

Maria didn’t cook the risotto properly. Nilka helped her out, and Maria finally made the food to Ramsay’s standards.

Scott improperly cooked potatoes, which resulted in Ramsay screaming at him.

Jason struggled on garnishes! (Seriously?)

After Salvatore got a mouthful from Ramsay about not writing the proper cooking temperature on the order, he stormed out of the kitchen. (Surely this couldn’t be a second week in a row where a contestant left the show by their own choice. Weird Andrew did it last week.)

Salvatore said if his team lost he would put himself up for elimination.

Meanwhile, Fran had to recook a steak. She asked her teammates for help on meat. Jason continued to struggle on garnishes. Jamie continued to struggle on vegetables. Siobhan served raw halibut.

Fran continued to mess up on cooking meat. She started to cry in pain because of her burned hand. Autumn came over to assist, and Fran chewed her head off.

Like a trouper, Fran got her hand addressed by a medic and quickly returned to the kitchen.

Both teams completed service. But Ramsay said that the men’s team won. He told them that Benjamin was the reason.

The women’s team was tasked with choosing nominees for elimination, and Jamie’s name came up almost immediately. Maria said the only thing that Jamie had was an “excess amount of weight.” (Wow!)

The women chose Fran and Jamie. Jamie burned the mashed potatoes and the carrots, Nilka told Ramsay.

Fran told Ramsay that she had drive. Ramsay said he was worried because he didn’t think he could “teach an old dog new tricks.” (Ouch, Fran!)

Jamie was sent home, and it was more than time.

I was totally ready for another elimination in the second hour of the competition.

Scott and Salvatore stayed up late working on strategies to make Salvatore successful. (I don’t trust Scott at all.)

The next day, Ramsay challenged the teams to develop a meal based on a group of ingredients won during a dice game.

The men’s team won: halibut, endive, salsify, crab, peas and bacon.

The women’s team won: beets, shallots, mango, ham, turnips and duck.

The team’s had 30 minutes to come up with a dish using the six ingredients. Ramsay generally liked the offerings by the two teams. He thought that the women’s duck had too much fat. He thought the salsify was too bitter for the men’s team. The duck fat did in the women’s team. The men won by a tiny fraction, according to Ramsay.

The men went “skydiving” in a wind machine. The women had to clean the prep hall of the restaurant and prep for the night’s dinner service.

During the prep, Maria started crying because she was overwhelmed. (Seriously?)

Ramsay announced that during the dinner service, the contestants would be cooking for a roomful of minor celebs, including Kevin Frazier from “Entertainment Tonight” and Debi Mazar, an actress from “Entourage” and onetime Dancing With the Stars contestant.

Can I say how much Scott really annoys me! He was being extremely condescending to his teammates under the guise of teamwork. (And was I the only one who notices that regal sounding music that was played each time he talked during a confessional?)

Back in the kitchen, Siobhan couldn’t cook the pasta correctly. (In her defense, the lobster was incorrectly labeled as crab, which caused Ramsay to scream.)

Autumn used tongs instead of a spatula to pick up fish. Ramsay yelled at her for this.

Know-It-All Scott incorrectly cooked meat. (But how could this be possible?) Meanwhile, line cook Nilka rocked the meat station. Back to Scott, who had been bragging about his superior culinary skills, served raw meat again. Ramsay honed in on him and cursed him out. Salvatore, who was under Scott’s “wings” earlier in the episode was having no problem cooking halibut.

Both teams completed their dinner service.

Ramsay said he was amazed at how good both kitchens were during the service.

Ramsay said Nilka and Salvatore did a great job. As a result he charged each to nominate a member from each team to be eliminated.

Nilka chose Autumn because she didn’t perform to her full potential. Salvatore chose Scott because he didn’t cook the meet properly.

Ramsay said that Autumn was the appendix of her team. “Everyone wants you out,” Ramsay said. He also called her “soulless.” Autumn said she loved food and that she wasn’t soulless.

Scott said he was too much of a leader, and Ramsay said that Scott was not as good as he thought he was.

Ramsay then threw everyone for a loop and announced there was not going to be an elimination. Instead he sent both cooks to the opposing team.

Both contestants vowed to cook to the best of their ability. (Blah, blah, blah.)

It should be interesting to see how both contestants mesh with their new teammates.



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